Getting Your House in Order

This title could have several different meanings. First of all, I am getting my house in order because it's for sale now and I am dwindling down on the contents of it, so I don't have to take it all with me when I move. This is something I would suggest everyone to do every year - or at least every five years. Are you amazed at how much stuff you have in your house? I am. I shouldn't even be surprised because I shop at Walmart and Kmart and usually bring home more things than are on my list. I guess I need to learn to be more frugal.

What about the Blizzard of 2016? My son in law, who lives in Charlotte was standing in a line that wrapped around the inside of a grocery store - just waiting to check out. Yes - people go crazy when they hear there's a storm approaching. It could be a hurricane - long lines have been seen at Home Depot buying up cases of water and boards for their windows.

So perhaps we're all a bit unprepared for the things life throws at us.

This blog is about death - that is "getting your house in order" aka getting all your affairs straightened out before it's time for you to go, die. Or before your spouse dies.

Now death is inevitable, yet no one knows the time or day of their departure, even if they're only given 6 months to live. It could only be 6 days. So what are some things you can do to be prepared, even if neither you nor your spouse (or significant other) is sick.

There are professionals who can help you prepare your wills, and will prefer you have a living will - that is, what is expected if your heart stops beating - should they resuscitate you? Do you have to have feeding tubes? Do you want to be kept alive by machines only? These are questions that need to be answered when you become an adult. And you can change your mind throughout your life, as long as you keep it documented - and keep the originals in a safe (and tell someone where the key is, or the combination). A will will protect your children from being put into social services - so make sure you have allocated someone else to care for them in your absence.

You can also talk to a funeral director and pre-pay for services. You can have a general idea of a style of casket and vault (though I tend to think they may change over the years) - or you could just put down a certain amount of money to help cover the cost. So your loved ones don't have to worry about this.

In Jan 2012, my husband received the news that he had an incurable cancer. The time frame given was only that in 6 months, 50% were still living. He wanted to be part of that %. So he said, we need to take care of the final things first, so that he didn't have to worry about me after he died. So we set up a time to talk with the funeral director - though we did not prepay anything there; we did purchase a plot at the cemetery we our bodies would have their final resting place. We spoke to our church and the pastors and talked about the type of funeral service my husband would want to have - and we called it a celebration service. We talked about how the service would go - we would have the burial service first thing in the morning with family and close friends, and then we would go to the church for coffee and cookies and then wait an hour and have the celebration service at 11am, followed by a luncheon. Over a hundred people stayed for the lunch. Sometimes I think when you have the burial between the service and the luncheon, then you don't always get your friends to come back for the luncheon (and then you have a ton of food leftover).

So be prepared - and then enjoy your life. Some of the other things he did ahead of time included canceling credit card accounts - things that were in his name only. And he moved all of his money into the joint account. One of the things that worked in our favor was that we were planning a yard sale and he was able to help price the items to sell - all of his contractor tools, etc. Unfortunately, he died the week before the sale - but with family and friends around, we had a successful sale for sure. It kept me busy - too busy to really grasp the grief - which did finally hit me after everyone went home.

And a few things I wish we had taken care of together was - what were all these keys for? At first I had to search through his things to find the keys to our fairly new home to give to the realtor, and then suddenly, I had tons of keys. I knew some of them belonged to our rental property and our flip house, but we definitely had plenty of extras. I'm just now - looking at them again and deciding what to do with them? I'm thinking there must be a craft person out there somewhere who would love a bag for of keys. If that's you, let me know.

Also, if you're online - and your spouse has accounts such as email, FB, etc. Make sure you have the logins and password info for them - so you can close them out properly. This goes with any bank or other financial institution. The more you write down ahead of time (and keep locked in your safe), the smoother the transition will be when the time comes for you to deal with all of this. It's definitely an adventure. But if you start when you're 18, keep good records in a safe box (fire proof and water proof), then as your life changes, such as you get married - make the necessary changes and put them back in the safe. Always stay on top of your game.

I hope this was some useful information to you - feel free to share with others. Or add comments with your own suggestions. Thanks - God bless you!